***********
"We've taken your ideas to heart Ms. Carmichael, and we've decided that we like the Booker T angle, and we want him to make a run for the title." The writer known as Michelle said.
Hayley couldn't believe her ears when Michelle talked. This was the closest she had ever come to actually getting these people to like her, and she wondered if it had something to do with Jim sitting in the room with them this time. At the last meeting, they were alone and she didn't get anywhere, but this time, they actually smiled at her when she talked. It was like walking into another universe.
"Well I'm glad; I mean this wasn't something I expected to hear tonight."
"Well, I've talked to the group of people and they know they have been treating you badly, but after being run for so long on their own without real leadership, they feel they could do it on their own and make good television. It seems they've seen the error of their ways, wouldn't you say?" Jim said with a grin. It was obvious to Hayley that he had had something to do with it.
"Okay, so that about wraps everything up here I think. I don't see any reason to continue this. I will work with the ideas you've all given me, and the ideas I already have in motion and get back to you with them next week. Have a good everyone and thank you for finally understanding me, and what I want to do here. We all are on the same team."
Everyone started filing their things and getting out of the rooms to get to the back and watch the show, and see how well the angles worked. Before Jim could leave though Hayley pulled him aside. She wanted to make sure this wasn't some part of a bigger plan that he wasn't telling her about.
"Jim, what did you have to promise them to make them listen?"
"I didn't promise them anything, but there is something I want to discuss with you Hayley, if you have a few minutes."
"I have all the time in the world. What's on your mind?"
"I've been informed that you were in the hospital last week, and I've since found out the reason, and I want to know how you're doing."
"How did you hear?"
"Shane came and saw me, and asked me to take the load off of you for awhile. I hope you don't mind. I just wish you could have come to me."
"It's not really something that you should be concerned with. As far as things go on this end of the job, coming here and doing these meetings and the writing, it isn't too much for me. I just take it easier when I go home so I don't do any harm to myself. I just can't believe he told you."
"Hayley, I know how close the two of you are, and so do most of the people here, you love each other and I've seen that before, with Summer and Jeff, and I know what it does to people in this business. So don't try to hide anything from me. Shane was concerned about you and the workload and problems you take on every week here and asked me to look into it for you, and give you some time."
"So the talk with the writers is all centered on my illness? Does everyone know now?"
"Hayley don't take that tone with me. No one else knows at this point, but me and Vince because as much as you want to make this all your issue, it isn't yours alone anymore. We don't want anything to happen to you, and what that means is lightening your workload. Vince is in agreement that the writers don't need to know what's wrong, but we don't want anything serious to happen here with you again."
"So what are you saying? You want me to quit?"
"No, that's not it at all, I just wanted to make you aware that Shane came to see me and I'm worried about you. That's all it is. I want you to continue doing the great job you're doing, and do it well. I just want you to know that around here we are all family, and we look out for one another. I'm just letting you know in no uncertain terms that I'm here if you need me for anything alright?"
"I'll keep that in mind Jim, thank you."
"That's all I ask, now get your stuff together and go home and take a good rest"
"I will, and thanks again for whatever you did for me with the writers."
****************
"How are ya dealing buddy?" Jeff asked throwing his bag down in the locker room and glancing at Shane.
"Dealing with what Jeff?"
"Shane, your girlfriend has cancer, and this is hard enough on her, knowing that you know, so I'm asking how my best friend is dealing with things."
"I'm dealing with it fine. I just want to spend every waking moment with her so nothing happens to her. I know I can't be there all the time and that scares me."
"She's alright you know right?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean she's not getting sick like she did a couple weeks ago, and she's happier then I've ever seen her. You have such a good thing with her, and I know she'd want you to know how happy she is."
"Do you speak for her now pal?"
"No, I just think the two of you have something special that's all."
"Stop getting involved Jeff."
"I'm not getting involved, I'm just commenting on how good my two friends are for one another. I just wish I'd gone with you guys to that club."
"What so you could meet her first?"
"Shane that's uncalled for buddy and you know it. I'm married to Summer, who is also your best friend and we are happy. I can't believe you'd say that to me man."
"I'm sorry Jeff, but I did something stupid tonight and I think Hayley might break up with me for it."
Jeff glanced at Shane questioningly. He couldn't think of anything that Shane could do that would make Hayley want to break up with him. It just wasn't in Shane to intentionally hurt someone. They had been friends for years and he'd always been the one getting hurt.
"What did you do buddy? It can't really be that bad man. Hayley loves you."
"Oh its bad Jeff, you don't even know the half of it."
************
"So how was your prom princess?" Trish asked Hayley as she sat down in the locker room to check out the action in the ring.
"It was wonderful, the best time of my life." Hayley said fading off, lost in thought.
"So why do you have that look of death in your eyes then? If you had such a good time you should be beaming."
"I was beaming, I've been beaming all week, I mean we were finally together in every way that night, and it was just the best time of my life. It really sealed everything in stone for me."
"So then what's the problem?"
"Jim went to bat for me with the writers and it just set something off in me I guess. I just need to talk to Shane about it I guess."
"What does Jim have to do with Shane?"
"It's a long story. and I know you have a match. You are scheduled to win the title back at the PPV you know?"
"I do know that, Jim came and told me and thank you so much because I know it had a lot to do with you and your wonderful writing." Trish smiled and sat down beside Hayley. Summer had explained to her that Hayley had some medical issues and she figured that's what was worrying Hayley tonight and making her not focus on how happy she had become over the last several weeks.
"It had to do with your talent actually, and the fact that the writers already liked you before I got here. But none the less you deserve it princess."
"So you want to tell me what Shane and Jim have in common with your attitude?"
"He told Jim I was sick Trish and now Vince know, and it seems like no one has faith in me that I can still do my job the right way."
"He did what?"
"Shane went to Jim sometime recently and told him about my hospital stay and my illness, and that I needed an easier work load. Which I don't, need really. I'm doing just fine right now."
"You need to find Shane and talk to him about this sweetheart, maybe it was something he felt he needed to do."
"You know what Trish? This is my life that everyone is playing with here. Yes I'm sick, god sicker then I've ever been and I don't see it getting better before it gets worse, but it's my life and I need to deal with it my own way." Hayley exclaimed before storming out of the locker room. She needed to be alone because right now she just wanted to hurt someone, and she didn't want to explode. It wasn't right. Walking down the hallway she hit the production area, in the back where the trucks were parked. She just needed to get her head on straight.
**********
"What did you do man?" Jeff asked pacing back and forth. He was starting to get concerned now. Shane looked really worried.
"I told Jim that Hayley was in the hospital and about the cancer. I just thought he should know, because she needs a lighter work load. But now I can't help thinking that when she finds out, she's going to go mental."
"Why would you do that Shane?"
"I thought it needed to be done Jeff. God of all people you should understand."
"Sorry dude but I don't get it. You shouldn't have done that. It's her life, and when she's ready to tell people, that's when she does it. I can't believe you tried to play god with someone's life here."
"What the hell are you saying?"
"I'm saying you better find her before she finds you and kicks your ass but good for this. Because Shane she will find out about what you did and when she does, she's going to be hurt. You don't interfere like that with something this serious. I admit, you want to help and I give you credit for that, you're a good guy man, but you don't go about it this way."
"She's going to kill me isn't she?"
"She probably won't Shane, but she's going to be hurt and she might lose trust in you. You're her boyfriend, she trusted you enough to tell you that she was sick and thought it would stay between you two, but now man, and it looks like you don't care about her trust in you."
"Jeff, I can't lose her, not now. I need her."
"How serious are you guys?"
"We've done everything Jeff, we're as close as two people can get and in the beginning I didn't want that, but now that its here, I can't lose it."
"Then be prepared to grovel dude. Because she's going to want to hurt you, or leave you, whatever strikes her mind first?"
*****************
*************
Hayley walked between the production trucks and heard the music playing out of them. She stopped to listen to what the guys were listening too and immediately recognized the music. Sitting down on the stairs of the production truck she just let herself get consumed by the music and her thoughts.
~~~~~
Long lost words whisper slowly to me
still can't find what keeps me here
when all this time I've been so hollow inside
I know you're still there
~~~~~
"Hiding out again are we?"
Hayley looked up to see Jeff standing there with a small grin on his face. It seemed that whenever she was at her worst, he was always around. She was beginning to wonder if him being there wasn't a sign of bad things to come.
"That's the basic premise yes. I just needed some time to myself for once. I just blew up at Trish so I don't think I'm going to be welcomed back in the women's locker room tonight."
"Why did you blow up at Trish?" Jeff asked laughing.
"I don't see how its funny that I blew up at someone I consider a friend, but for the record, I blew up at her because of something from earlier in the night. It had nothing to do with her."
"Well then why did you do it?"
"I'm just pissed off is all, and if you had been there or even Summer I would have done the same thing to you guys. I just needed an outlet to vent I suppose."
"So why don't you tell me what happened?"
Jeff looked at Hayley and waited for her to tell him what was wrong. He knew from the last time they talked that she was worried about her illness and how people were treating her, but he had a feeling this had nothing to do with that. He just hoped she would trust him enough to tell him, because it was obvious that she needed to tell someone.
"It's nice back here don't you think?"
"Yeah, the funny thing is I used to come back here all the time with my guitar and just sing and play music. No one was ever around so they never knew what I did, well until Summer, she figured me out pretty quick."
"You aren't really that hard to figure out you know. It's a nice place back here when you want to be alone."
"Yeah it worked wonders for me when I needed some time alone, like when they wanted to put me with Amy, and when Summer and I were all confused on how we felt about each other."
"You've gone through a lot here haven't you?"
"Like I told you before, my whole existence revolved around the wrestling business for a long time, and well most of my good memories are here, as well as the bad. So how is the writing coming?"
"Oh it's going good now. Jim seems to think talking to writers on my behalf will help, and I will grant you it did, but for all the wrong reasons."
"What do you mean?"
"Jeff, did you tell anyone I was sick?"
"No, because it's your place princess. I mean Summer and I have talked about it with each other, but we would never tell anyone without talking to you first. This is your life, not ours."
"See that's what I'm thinking too."
"So you know what Shane did then?"
"Yeah I do, how the hell do you know?"
"I just came from there, and he's pretty messed up over it, so I figured you might know about it."
"Why would he do it Jeff? Isn't this my life, and my illness?"
"It is your life princess but he is a huge part of it, and he really was doing what he thought was right for you. I think on his part it's a little selfish too. I mean he wants you to be alright and not to get any worse. I can see where's he coming from, but he should have talked to you first."
"That's why I'm out here and not with him, because right now I might punch him if I see him."
"Is that all you'd do?"
"What do you mean?"
"Shane is in the locker room thinking you are going to break up with him over this, and I have to admit, this is something that warrants a good fight, so I wouldn't be surprised if it led to a break up, but I don't want to see that happen, for either one of you."
"I wouldn't even think of breaking off with Shane, I'm just pissed off."
"With good reason. You want some advice?"
"Always, you are the good advice guy lately." Hayley said laughing.
"Go talk to him and get this all out in the open. It will do you both a world of good. Not to mention when he hears that you don't want to leave him over this, he might just jump you. He really was worried about that."
"I'll take you up on that Jeff. You know what though? You should really think about getting back in the ring again. You are here so much lately that I think you want your old job back."
"Not on your life, the timing isn't right and Summer doesn't want to come back."
"Jeff, do me a favor alright? If you do nothing else for me, go talk to your wife about this, and really listen to her. You'd be surprised what you learn when you talk with the one you love. I mean you want me to talk to Shane about this right now right? So you do the same. You might just see something you didn't before."
************
Hayley knocked lightly on the locker room door. She knew that Shane shared with some of the other guys, and lately they hadn't been in there with him, but she didn't want to take a chance and walk in on some of them naked. She waited while she heard scuffling in the background and then Shane called out to her.
"Yeah come in, I was just getting dressed."
"You don't have to do that on my account, I prefer you naked." Hayley smiled and Shane pulled her into a hug. She figured she would wait and see If he wanted to tell her what he'd done, rather then flip out on him. Although she felt after her talk with Jeff, she wasn't as angry anymore.
"I know you do, and we have all the time in the world to do that back at the house when we get home. So are you done with your meeting?"
"Yeah, I finished awhile ago, and I was going to watch the show to see how well things are turning out, but I got sidetracked with something and just went off to be alone."
"Oh. Hayley I need to talk to you about something."
"What is it Shane?"
"I told Vince and Jim that you were sick, and I'm really sorry and if you want to break it off with me, I will totally understand. Jeff made me see that it wasn't my place. I just wanted to make sure that you were alright. I don't want to have to bring you to the hospital anymore.. Can you please forgive?"
Hayley decided not to let him finish his sentence. She pulled him to her hard and kissed him passionately. She wanted him to know in no uncertain terms that she loved him and wasn't going to leave.
"Where did that come from?"
"My heart, and for the record I know what you've done. Jim told me earlier. Which is why I was in the back, cooling my jets."
"So you're not mad?"
"Oh Shane, I'm really mad, but you know what? I wouldn't leave you because of it, I love you, you big idiot. I just want you to understand something, this illness is mine alone. You can be there for me, but I'm the one that has to fight with it and beat it alright?"
"I understand.. And I can deal with you being mad at me as long as you keep kissing me like that."
"Well let's just get the hell out of here and we'll see about that alright?"
***********************
**************
"The doctor will see you now Hayley."
"Thanks Marissa, I'll talk to you later."
Making her way into the doctor's office to wait for her, Hayley got this nervous feeling in her stomach. She didn't want to be here, but she had to do this for Shane as well as herself. She already knew what was coming, but she wanted to be sure. Doctor Abrams entered the office and smiled lightly at Hayley. She had a feeling this was going to be bad.
"Thank you for coming in to see me on such short notice. I need to discuss some things with you, and then go from there alright?"
"Of course Dr. Abrams."
"I've gone over the X-rays as well as the information from the hospital in Dallas, and after the blood test they ran there, we have reason to believe this is ovarian and if we don't handle it right away, it could spread, and could be life threatening."
"Has it spread?"
"At this time I can't be sure if it has or not because we didn't know the severity of it, but we will have to run tests on that too, we don't want it to be spreading because it means more work in tracking and keeping it under control."
"So what do I have to do?"
"We have a doctor on call today, who specializes in surgery to remove the ovaries and fallopian tubes. Would you be up to going into surgery today?"
"I'm not going to be able to have kids am I?"
"No, I'm sorry Hayley you won't."
"God this isn't right! Why did this have to happen to me?"
'Its genetics, and there is no real reason for it. I'm sorry to do this to you but if we don't take of this right now, something serious could happen, and I don't want to think that way at this stage. You're too young for that."
"I can do whatever you need me to do to make this go away. So book me with this surgeon. Do I need to call my work and have some time off?"
"I would advise you to do that yes, because you wont be mobile for awhile afterwards. They will probably let you go home with homecare but as far as work goes, it's out of the question. Unless you can work from your bed at home."
"I'll deal with it, but can you tell me whets going to happen to me when I get down there?"
"He will prepare you when you meet with him downstairs, but what I can tell you, is you will be knocked out and they are going to remove as much of the cancer as they can find. It's a serious surgery but it has a wonderful success rate, which is what we are hoping on with this Hayley."
"Okay, so when do we start?"
"Do you want anyone here with you?"
"Yeah, I can call someone to be here with me."
"Well do that and go meet Dr. Hodges downstairs on the third floor. He'll be expecting you. I will be there shortly to be with you. This will all work out Hayley, you'll see. We are going to help you get through this."
"I just don't want to end up like my mother."
"Well that's what I'm here to prevent."
***********
"So can you get here as soon as possible? I can't do this alone." Hayley pleaded.
"There is no where else I'd rather be, your at Raleigh General right?"
"Yeah, and they want to start as soon as they can. I hate to do this to you, but I can't get a hold of anyone else. You're my last hope."
"I'll be there, just hang in there. I'm on the way."
**********
"Now Hayley, what we are doing here is a hysterectomy, which means I'm going to removing everything I can find that might be cancerous alright? Do you understand what I'm saying?" Dr. Hodges asked.
"Yes, I was here when my mother went through hers. I understand what you're going to have to do. Is it okay if I have someone in there with me, he won't get in the way?"
"Of course, we actually prefer that someone is there, although most women choose to have another woman with them, for obvious reasons. But your friend can be there."
"Thank you. He will be here soon, but while we wait I can get prepped for the surgery."
"Just take everything off and put this gown on with the front open alright? I will be back in a few minutes and when your friend arrives I will send him in for you alright?"
"Thank you Dr.Hodges."
"We're going to help you Hayley, and hopefully make you good as new."
Hayley couldn't help feeling sick to her stomach. She would never be good as new even if they did remove all the cancer from her system. She was never going to be normal again. She would never be able to wake up next to Shane and go check on their kids, and be a real family and a real mother. Every dream she ever had seemed to be going to hell all based around this surgery. She really wasn't sure if this was the right thing.
*********
"You made it alright?"
"Well I'm standing here aren't I?"
"Yeah you are. I'm sorry I had to call you to come be with me, there wasn't anyone else."
"You're my friend and you're going through some really hard stuff right now, so of course I would be here. Are you sure you don't want me to call Summer though? She's a woman and she would understand this more."
"I called her cell and the house, which is where I got you, but if you're uncomfortable, then you don't have to be here."
"No Hayley, I said I would do this for you, and I will. I was just making sure you were alright. So when do you go in?"
"Now that you're here, right now. Can you be in the room with me?"
"Yes Hayley, I can."
"Thanks Jeff, it really means a lot you being here for me."
"Well I want my girl to be alright, so of course I have to be here, plus if I wasn't and Shane found out, he'd kill me."
"Things are going to change so much now Jeff, I don't know if I can keep going." Hayley said as Jeff pulled her into a hug. It was obvious this was all taking its toll on her, and she was finally letting it show.
"You can, because I'm going to help you. I'm not going anywhere Hayley."
At that moment the door opened and Dr. Hodges made his way into the room. With one motion of his hand and an unspoken word, the orderlies moved the bed and they made their way down the hall to where the surgery would be taking place. Hayley hoped that this would be the end of it, because she couldn't do this anymore, and she didn't know how she was going to explain all of this to Shane.
*************
